Jan 27 2021
“Windy, my man,” said Doc, “how are
you and the widow getting along?”
“She’s been sortacreepitatin’ up on my blind side,
Doc,” Windy said.
“Which side is that, Windy?”
“Very humoristic, Dud. Ha. Ha.”
We had all been watching, as closely as we could,
the relationship between Windy Wilson, bachelor, camp cook,
cowboy, and teller of tales … and Mamie Dilworth, aging hippie
chick, starer at crystals, vegetarian, widow.
We all knew, those of us who lived vicariously
alongside the perimeter of their friendship, that if it could’ve
been filmed, it’d be on television longer than The Flying Nun.
“Doc,” said Windy, “ol’ Mame the Dame is a awful
nice lady, sure ‘nuf. I have considerationed maybe takin’ our
friendship to the next level.”
“What level is that?”
“Steve, that would be puttin’ one of my patented power
sneaks on ‘er and holdin’ hands.”
“Be careful you don’t rush these things, Windy.
You’ve only known each other a couple of years now.”
“I’ll be careful, Doc, don’t you worry none. Why, we
almost got to that there hand-holdin’ when we capper-sized that
stock tank boat of mine in the crick. Had to pull ‘er out.
Weren’t no grateful smooch, howsomever.”
“So why ramp it up now?”
“Valentine’s Day, Steve! Comin’ up, ain’t it.
Yessir, afore long there’s gonna be young lovers squarin’ off
and smoochin’ and darin’ the world to stop ‘em from cuddlin.’ I
really take to Valentine’s Day.”
“Buy her a card yet?”
“Thinkin’ on it, Doc. But I gotta get jest the right
kind. Can’t be too moochie-smoochie or she’ll get the wrong
idear. What I’m lookin’ for is one that says, ‘Mame, I kinda
like you and think you’se smart and kind, And would you like to
hold hands and talk about good stuff? And no more a-them tofu
tacos, thank you.”
“That’s a tall order, Windy.”
“Valentine’s only comes oncet a year, boys.”
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Brought to you by A Cowboy’s Guide to Growing Up Right. Look it
over at www.lpdpress.com. Avuncular tips from a guy who made
lots of mistakes.