Alphonse Wilson here, you know … yore
pal Windy? And
I’m here to set the record straight, once
and forever more, on turkeys.
Now for
those folks
out there who think a turkey is something hot and brown and
tasty and is full
of stuffing, this here’ll come as a shock. You see, before he
becomes a
tasteful delicacity, the turkey is a big ol’ bird who lives in
the woods, or on
a farm, and ain’t too awful smart, neither. Iffen a turkey was
smart, we’d
probably have to eat vegetables for Thanksgiving. Now that’s a
fact. Truth be
told, if you had a big ol’ dial thingie with Alfred Linestein
on one end of the
smart meter … you know, like to measure who is the
intellectual prairie fire
and who ain’t? … wellsir, at the very other end of that dial
you’d have a flat
brown rock, and then, ‘way off in the distance … the other
side of the rock,
there’d be a turkey.
And that
thereturkey’d be there all by hisself, too. So you might think
he’d get kinda
lonesome out there all solitaried, right? Nossir. That’s
‘cause he ain’t smart
enough to get lonesome.
Ain’t but
two
things a turkey can do proper, folks. Just two, and you can
take this to the
blank, too. For one thing, he companionizes right well with
cranberry sauce
twice or once a year. Yes he does. And for another? Well, he
just might make a
likely candidate for the United States Congress of America!
And you
can tell
‘em I said so.
This
year, disguise
your turkey as something that doesn’t taste as good. You
know, like a porcupine,
or squash.
Ideas at www.simpleeverydaymom.com.