It’s always a treat when Windy Wilson stops by the Mule
Barn for a cup and a visit with us. He got all settled in
while we waited for him.
“Now you fellas know it shore ain’t
perlite to interrupt a guy when he’s educatin’ the kids,
right? A real gentleman wouldn’t do it. But that didn’t slow
down this weird young guy who was visitin’ one of our hometown
girls.
“I think she met him in college where he
was majorin’ in bein’ wrong, and brought him home to meet the
folks. The way it was, I had a few kids I found coming out of
the malt shop and I kinda herded them over to this year
sidewalk bench so I could ‘splain how school used to was back
in the day, you know?
“So in the midst of my dislertation, this
weirdo guy walks up and says to me that I shouldn’t be tellin’
them kids about workin’ hard because that’s jest how the
gov’ment gets ahold of ‘em and makes ‘em into slaves. Hey, I’m
not klddin’!
“Then he starts in to lecturin’ them, and me,
about how we have too much stuff and need to share it with
other folks. Now that ain’t bad, I guess. I don’t mind sharin’
Seems right. But then he says we don’t have the right to own
anythin’ at all.
“I had me a look to see how these year kids was
ascorbing this nonsense and I saw that Garcia kid wasn’t
happy. He jest got a brand-new bike last week or month or
somethin’ and he thought he ought to keep it.
“So, bein’ the on-the-spot grown up, I ups and
asks weirdo what he would suggest we all do about it, and he
looks straight at me and tells me to go dial an electric
materialism!
“Took me kinder flat-footed there for a second,
but I rallied. I puffed up a bit and straightened HIM out. I
said, ‘I ain’t gonna do it!’”
Windy paused.
“Besides, guys, I shore didn’t know which
number to dial.”
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